*thud* Oh, I love this. Absolutely love it. I don't think you've got Octane wrong to be honest, at least not in a short fic - if you were going to expand this I'd suggest more snarking on all sides, but then writing snarky 'Con dialogue is one of those things it's easy to spend all day doing. :)

Also, love your use/subversion of the provided theme. Ah, the joys of TFdom... refreshes the parts other fandoms don't have physical access to... ;)